Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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