only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
There r osticjed everywhere
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
