I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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