Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I lost the right to judge tonight
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize