It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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