Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
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