Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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