he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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