Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
