thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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