Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
