I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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