I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
