what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Randomize