Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
