Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Randomize
