he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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