do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
