Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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