Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I need a burrito and a hug.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
