Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
