I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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