Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Randomize