it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Slut skills are useful in every country.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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