i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize