Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Alive.
So much puke
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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