Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I skipped work to stalk him.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize