so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
