i just google imaged poop.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
