I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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