She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
My ass is underappreciated
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
