Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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