covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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