Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
