Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
