Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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