Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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