According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
