so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize