The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
