And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
