Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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