ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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