They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
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