google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
This is classic penis vs brain.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
