the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
