So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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