Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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