We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
