yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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